• For I Fear •
I seldom talk to you
these days
for I fear blurting out
my fears
in front of you,
for what I feared
for years
that you’ll change too
one day
making my fears come true
did come true finally,
for you now fearlessly
shift your shades
like a chameleon
as you no longer fear
losing me
for you’re sure
that I won’t and can’t leave you
for I have nowhere to go —
no kith and kin,
and moreover, I fear losing you.
I do not fear you
for I fear no human,
and that’s something
that you do fear.
You want me to fear,
if not you, then others —
other things and people,
for you believe
that only fear can tame me,
and that’s something I fear.
I fear you knowing my fears,
and that’s why
I want my fears
to remain confidential
as I fear that after
being acquainted with my fears
you’ll fearlessly add
fuel to my inner, silent fire of fear.
These days,
I fear fear a little more
for no matter
how much I’ve feared
and since how long
I’ve been fearing,
fear still never fails
in horripilating me.
However, I hell am aware
that my present fears
are pointless,
as these fears are mere results
of my altschmerz.
Ah! But I still do fear.
